A Few Fall Days

Millennials may not be young anymore, but our formative years were shaped by some of the most radical changes in American history.

It’s a strange thing watching the world you know come to an end. There’s something in the human mind that yearns for some sort of permanence in the midst of great change. Yet, the only seeming constant is change itself.

Our post-COVID world is best described as discombobulated. It feels as if every institution from politics to business to culture - to even religion - remains disrupted in ways once thought unimaginable. It was said during the Russian Revolution that “there are years when weeks happen and then there are weeks where years happen”. Our age belongs to the latter.

It is one thing to write of the coming reckoning of American elites, the inevitable fragmentation of globalization, or China’s greying future but it is another to live these events. There may be trends driving the future of human civilization, but we mustn’t forget that we are not the mere passive observers of history, but also its agents. The human element of geopolitical analysis cannot be overlooked for sometimes the story of a single human life can provide insights into the greater tapestry of events.

Millennials often gets a bad rap in the popular discourse. My generation tends to be labelled as lazy, entitled, and directionless, yet such tropes overlook the reality that millennials experienced some of the most radical changes in American history during the most formative years of their lives.

My story is reflective of the millennial generation. Born in 1992, the year after the Soviet Union collapsed, my childhood is full of memories that characterize the classic middle-class child growing up in the 90s. I remember going to places like Discovery Zone and getting lost in the maze of tubes. I remember being forcibly dragged out of the ball pit at Chuck E. Cheese. I remember going outside every evening to play random games with the neighborhood kids - all without parent supervision! We didn't have a care in the world, and every day seems better than the next.

Then the unthinkable happens: 9/11.

I am homeschooled at the time. It is just another tranquil fall day in Central Florida as I begin my math homework. Then my mom gets a call from my dad to turn on the television. The first thing we see is the second plane hitting the World Trade Center.

My mom tries to shield me from what was on the TV screen, but to no avail. I have to watch. As I watch the buildings collapse before my eyes, the people leaping from the building to their certain doom. There is something in my eight-year-old brain that knows I am witnessing history. I write in my little journal that this is my generation’s Pearl Harbor. I was a strange child. I mean, what eight-year-old thinks like that?

Yet, time goes on.

Like every child, I progress from an age of innocence and begin experiencing the world. These experiences soon make me realize that many of the things I was taught as a child are but a comforting lie. Reconciling these harsh realities results in a time of frustration and rebellion.

And so too it is with the United States.

Throughout the 90s, Americans are told by their leaders we are witnessing “the end of history”. While there are still issues to resolve, the overall problem of tragedy is solved. We are now in an era of perpetual peace and perpetual prosperity. We are promised these things.

The promise of perpetual peace dies on 9/11.

We watch as America invades Afghanistan in spirit of terrible vengeance to depose the Taliban, to kill Osama bin Laden, and to eradicate Al Qaeda from the face of the earth. We watch as bin Laden escapes and our mission of righteous fury morphs into prolonged occupation and nation building. We all cheer as U.S. Marines capture Baghdad and topple Saddam Hussein, after all he is a very bad man. One Sunday morning my pastor announces to wild cheers "ladies and gentlemen, we got him." Nevertheless, Iraq becomes yet another protracted campaign of occupation, pacification, and nation building.

But what does this mission of “making the world safe for democracy” ultimately bring us? The feelings of angst and discontent begin to stir.

Just as the American people start questioning the wisdom of our prolonged War on Terror, disaster strikes at home. One fateful fall day in 2008, Lehman Brother declares bankruptcy. The promise of perpetual prosperity dies on 9/15.

I turn 16 as the economic and financial carnage unfolds. I watch as stocks markets are thrown in chaos. I watch as friends’ parents lose their jobs. I hear stories of those who’ve even lost their homes. Meanwhile, Wall Street receives a $700 billion bailout even as bankers receive record bonuses. A righteous fury builds.

But in the midst of the growing malaise, America is promised “Hope and Change.” Barack Obama is elected on the promise of being a transformational President, yet he actively chooses to not prosecute the individuals on Wall Street responsible for the financial crisis. He does nothing as millions of Americans lose their homes. Instead, President Obama uses his Democratic supermajority to overhaul the American healthcare system promising "If you like your doctor, you will be able to keep your doctor.” Another lie.

The age of optimism gives way to the age of cynicism.

As the 2010s unfold, I enter young adulthood and begin to see just how broken America really is. I witness as popular figures stoke outrage and anger, for they have nothing else to offer. Meanwhile, the gravy train for the political, cultural, and commercial elites never ceases. Income inequality continues to grow. Older millennials just graduating college discover that the college degree promised as a golden ticket to success doesn’t open that many doors after all. Yet, again, a lie. So maybe a few years of graduate school and some more student loan debt will fix things?

Yeah, about that.

Like many millennials, I find myself caught up in the academic arms race. It's not just a matter of having the degree anymore, you have to have the right degree from the right school if you want a chance at that ticket to success. Even then, you better work your butt off and network with the right kinds of people if you want even to get a look for that dream job after graduation. Is this what we were all promised us children?

As I move from city to city for my university education, I see that all is not well with the American people. Real working-class wages haven’t an increased since the 1970s. Deaths of despair and drug overdoses are endemic. The optimism and opportunity of 1990s America is replaced by a desperation and nihilism that is completely foreign. It is difficult not to become cynical and jaded.

Then the 2016 election happens.

Like most kids born in the 90s, I was raised in a culturally Christian home and witness the reactions as the various Bill Clinton scandals unfold. I am told time after time by my parents, my pastors, and my leaders that character matters in politics. I watch with dismay as many of those I looked up don’t just vote for Trump but provide moral cover for him. This is the individual who proudly proclaimed, “Why do I have to repent or ask for forgiveness if I am not making mistakes?”

Rejecting Hillary Clinton is one thing, she is, after all, one of the most dishonest and corrupt political figures in modern American history. From lying about inside trading agricultural futures in the 90s, to taking bribes through the Clinton Foundation, to letting the Russians buyout American uranium reserves, to letting an American ambassador die to terrorists in Libya, to illegally storing top secret military intelligence on home grown servers then destroying the evidence, Hillary Clinton doesn’t just deserve to lose the election, she deserves to rot in prison. That doesn’t mean endorsing and fully defending Trump is justified.

The classical Greeks possessed a much different understanding of history than we moderns do. Today, we call an event tragic when bad thing happens that are outside our control. To the Greeks, tragedy is when you make a decision you believe is right that is going to cost you something because you believe the alternative is far worse.

There is a tragic case to be made for voting for Donald Trump in 2016. There is no such case for unequivocally supporting and defending Trump and all his excesses.

I interpret the results of 11/8 in two lights. First, is the rejection of Hillary Clinton since her corrupt nature and unquenchable lust for power are rightfully appalling to the American people. Second, a vote for Donald Trump is a repudiation of the status quo. This rejection takes two forms: desperation and nihilism. Some are so desperate for change that they think they have no other choice but to support Donald Trump. Others, just want to watch the world burn of anger and malice for how they believe they are mistreated by "the system". Regardless, the outcome is ugly. Division and discord increase at a fervent rate.

From politics to culture to business, the events of these past eight years are the result of millennial's coming-of-age and collective realization that the leaders they held in such esteem as children – the leaders that call the shots to this day – are nothing but liars and hypocrites.

How many self-professing Christian leaders preached during the Clinton years that character matters in politics only to endorse and even defend the immoral behavior of Donald Trump? How many double standards are there for those in power when it comes to mishandling classified documents, conducting insider trading as a politician, or using one's political connections to enrich family members?

Having been raised upon the principles of servant leadership and Christian charity, I watch with disgust as leader after leader in politics, business, culture, and religion becomes the embodiment of what I was raised to despise. Selfish ambition at the expense of those they lead is the hallmark of ruling elites. One gets the idea that self-sacrifice for the greater good is for suckers. The people soon heed the cues from their leaders as many pursue their own personal agendas, consequences for the nation be damned.

It is impossible to reflect upon the events these past seven years and not become overly emotional. And yet, we have not even begun to discuss the events of 2020.

Angst. Fear. Uncertainty. Distrust. Rage. Heartbreak. What more is there to say such a terrible year? The choices made during that awful time define our lives in ways we will never fully comprehend. It remains one of those few true inflection points of history. For millennials, we watched several of our formative young adult years after college vanish into oblivion. Yet, in many ways, very little has changed.

America is presently obsessed with the upcoming 2024 presidential election, and it appears the election will be but a retread of 2020. At what point, do we stop and ask ourselves “is this the best we can do?” Is an 80-year-old pathological liar who can barely string together a complete sentence and a dishonest 77-year-old former reality tv star under 91 criminal indictments truly the two best candidates for highest office? Is it any wonder why millennials are so cynical and upset at the current state of affairs?

My generation was promised a better tomorrow and instead we spent the past 30 years watching our living standards and ability to raise a family decline precipitously. Home ownership has never been more unaffordable and unachievable. The promise of a college education has been forged into chains as the rising costs of education and dearth of well-paying jobs makes student loan debt unrepayable for many. And it’s not like the debt is dischargeable via bankruptcy or colleges are on the hook for their students’ misery, you can thank Joe Biden for that one. All these trends converge to create a society where young people fail to get married or have kids. What’s more, sexual activity among young adults, especially among young adult males, keeps dropping with each passing year.

People are alone, angry, and depressed. Something has to change. The world we're living in is simply unsustainable. The world that millennials were promised no longer exists. It is a lie to pretend otherwise. Millennials were raised to dream big, to believe that we could change the world. Now we are told that we are entitled for desiring more from this life, for asking for the things that we were promised growing up. We’re harangued that we should know our place before seeking to change things.

Yet, all the while, our elders, the Silent Generation and Baby Boomers, continue to cling onto power while keeping one foot in the grave. How else should one interpret the aging Senators who prefer to die in office of old age and terminal illness rather than relinquish their grip on power? Raised on the importance of competence and promoting the best-qualified people for the job, we watch as our President struggles to climb stairs and our Senate Majority Leader nearly has a stroke on live tv.

The abandonment of classical American civic virtues didn’t start with millennials, we merely mimicked what we saw in our elders. A few fall days, 9/11, 9/15, and 11/8, totally reshaped millennials’ perception of reality. The intervening years only solidified our cynicism.

There is a general sentiment amongst millennials, including myself, that recognizes that the status quo is far beyond the need of reform, it is in need of a reckoning. Is it so much to ask that our leaders be held to the standards they once preached so vigorously when we were children? Is it so much to ask that our leaders be forced to play by the same rules that we the people must follow? Is it so much to ask that we ask our leaders and institutions to just be better?

The outcome of America’s crisis of legitimacy is found in the answer to these questions.